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Thread: Russian inventor designs caskets outfitted with alarm

  1. #1
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    Russian inventor designs caskets outfitted with alarm

    Russian inventor designs caskets outfitted with alarm buttons for those buried alive by mistake

    A person opens his eyes and can not understand where the hell he is. A bloodcurdling surmise finally crosses his mind. He realizes he has been buried alive and now he is lying in a casket some six feet under. It is well-known that stories like that normally have no happy ending. Scientific books contain a number of cases involving living persons buried by mistake. A person may be buried alive while sleeping in lethargy.

    Vitaly Malyukov, author of numerous inventions, honored inventor of the USSR, decided to improve the situation after conducting a detailed study of the problem. His invention includes a circular device (containing special membranes) which is mounted in a casket. Should a person recover consciousness, he will spot it right away because the device will be glowing red. A person buried alive will have to press that "alarm button" to raise the alarm at a control panel in the office of a cemetery caretaker. The alarm is designed to show which grave have signs of life, so to speak.

    It looks so simple yet nobody has come up with anything similar to Mr. Malyukov's invention. People used to put cell phones in the coffins. And those telephones sometimes rang underground. But the ringing was from the incoming calls made by those who did not know that the subscriber had been dead. Mr. Malyukov has his doubts that a person stuck in the casket will be able to grab a cell phone and use it properly. "Now all you have to do is touch the alarm button and wait a few minutes," says he. Mr. Malyukov does not reveal all the details pertaining to the "alarm system from the other side." He says he is going to sell it to the Japanese and make a lot of money when he finally goes broke.
    The problem with socialism is that you eventually,
    run out of other people’s money.
    ” - Margaret Thatcher

  2. #2
    Administrator PhilDernerJr's Avatar
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    I'm confused. How would a person who's been buried alive have the air to even awaken....communicate to someone and wait to be unburied?

    I call bull.
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  3. #3
    Senior Member RDU-JFK's Avatar
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    Also, even if by some miracle that this guy had survived that time underground, when he wakes up, he'd be so panicked trying to get out he would waste his air and energy trying to escape, and digging up the grave would be too time consuming. Also, how will the deceased know that there is a button there to be pushed?
    "I can't wait until tomorrow, cause I get better looking everyday"
    --Joe Namath

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    Moderator USAF Pilot 07's Avatar
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    It's a great invention, if you're the type of person who likes making money off of other peoples' sorrows.

    In a time of great mourning, many people don't want to believe their loved ones are actually dead. It's very hard to face those facts. Although we all know once someone is dead, especially for a prolonged period of time, they aren't coming back, there are people out there who for some reason or another won't accept that. This coffin allows them to partially hold on to some of that hope that their loved one isn't dead, and may come back, although we all know this will never be the case.

    Also, in many cultures, they don't embalm bodies after the person has passed. Although I'm not completely familiar with it, I believe the Jewish faith does this. In many other religions and cultures, especially outside the U.S., they will bury their deceased sometimes hours after their deaths. For those that can afford this coffin, it may give them that false sense of "he or she may come back", and they will purchase the coffin for this reason...

    Either way, it does put a pretty penny in the inventor's pocket. Ethically, there are definately arguments for and against this kind of invention...

  5. #5
    Administrator PhilDernerJr's Avatar
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    For those who are not embalmed, random postmortem nerve movement might cause accidental pushing of the button. That'll be fun.
    Email me anytime at [email protected].

  6. #6
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    Phil watches too much Six Feet Under :-P

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